Cruises, children, cancer mark 50 years of life together

Celebrating 50 years of marriage is a big deal, but when David and Linda Olesen talked about how they would commemorate their Golden Anniversary, they decided they wouldn’t have a big party – they would have a year of adventures.

“We decided 50 years of marriage was such a milestone that we could spend the entire year celebrating,” Linda said.

And so they did, starting back at the restaurant where they were engaged in February of 1964.

“Well it’s not the same restaurant. The building is still there, and it’s still a restaurant, but not the little Italian place where he proposed,” Linda said. “Same old building, but the prices quadrupled …”

“…and the food was nasty,” David interrupted with a laugh. Laughing is one of the couple’s favorite things to do. They agree having a good sense of humor is one of the keys to longevity in any relationship.

“Yes, the food could have been better, but it was the sentiment of it,” Linda said. “It was the ideal way to kick off our celebration even if the food wasn’t all that memorable.”

David, 70, and Linda, 69, grew up in Ferndale in Humboldt County, but now live in Napa. They began dating when David was a junior and Linda a sophomore in high school. They can’t agree on when exactly they started dating, but they agree that the first big milestone was their date to David’s junior prom.

“We were prom king and queen, which didn’t go over well with the junior girls since I was a sophomore,” Linda said.

“Well, I was class president, and it didn’t matter,” David said. “We were hot stuff.”

David graduated and went to college, but took a job with Bank of America a year later – a career he would maintain for 37 years. Linda initially went to beauty school, but later joined her husband at Bank of America.

After four years of dating, the couple married on Sept. 19, 1964 in Ferndale, but the honeymoon period only lasted three months. Ferndale was struck by a massive flood, and David and Linda lost nearly all of their wedding gifts.

“I guess we learned to just go with the flow after that,” Linda said. “Poor phrasing for that particular story, but it’s what you do in life.”

“We were poor as church mice in those early years,” David added. “But we didn’t realize it at the time. We were getting by fine.”

The couple raised two children, who also live in Napa and are now raising families of their own

“Children definitely add different kinds of stress to a relationship,” David said. “It’s a dynamic change, but we are very fortunate to have two really great kids. We’ve been blessed and our kids grew up to have families of their own, and now we have three wonderful grandchildren.”

In addition to having a good sense of humor, David and Linda credit family and open communication as keys to a successful marriage.

“Life is complicated. It’s important to talk things over –- to compromise,” David said. “You need to be understanding.”

“Open communication is very important,” Linda said. “You have to be able to talk to each other. We were lucky. We grew up in the same small town. We grew up with the same small-town values. We’re compatible in that way. Of course we have our differences, but it brings a balance. We just fit together. We wouldn’t know what to do without each other.”

Even when Linda was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer in 1997, the idea of being without each other was never an option. Leiomyosarcoma, a cancer caused by malignant tumors found in uterine fibroids, afflicts one in 1,000 women who have fibroids.

“The cancer she had was incredibility rare,” David said. “We were told fibroids were almost never cancerous, but not my little sweetie. She always has to swim upstream.”

Linda was diagnosed in November and began treatment the day after Christmas. “I didn’t see the point in waiting. I wanted to get it started and be done with it.”

David and Linda agree that fighting cancer is the most challenging thing they have gone through as a couple: Linda as the cancer patient and David as her caregiver.

“In all these years, that was the toughest thing we’ve been through, and it was hard,” Linda said. “Six months of chemotherapy treatments that lasted 72 hours at a time. It was a struggle. But you stay close to family and you pray. You take care of each other.”

Linda has been in remission and cancer free for 17 years. Battling cancer convinced Linda to retire early, and she didn’t return to her position at the bank. “I was bald, had no eyelashes; I was happy staying home,” she said, “so I decided to just retire.”

David followed suit and retired two years later. Enjoying early retirement in their 50s, David and Linda decided to travel. Their favorite mode of transportation: cruising.

“We love cruises,” David said. “We’ve been on dozens. Been all over the world. It’s a great way to travel. You know where you’re going to eat, where you’re going to sleep. You can stay on the ship or go on guided tours. We’ve been all over.”

They’ve traveled the Mediterranean, the Caribbean and visited ports throughout Europe and Asia. They also ventured to Alaska three times. They haven’t been to South America yet, but it’s on their to-do list.

They decided to incorporate cruising into their year-long Golden Anniversary celebration. Last September, David and Linda enjoyed a Caribbean cruise with two friends who were also celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary.

But to fully celebrate 50 years of marriage, David and Linda wanted to include their family, so when the grandkids were on holiday vacation in December, the couple invited their children and their families for a cruise of the Mexican Riviera.

In additions to the cruises, David and Linda commemorated their 50 years of marriage by enjoying celebratory dinners, trips to their ranch in Ferndale, a road trip across the Northwest with friends, and a few visits to Reno to catch live shows and play slots. They’ve officially crossed the 50-year mark, but the party isn’t over.

“It’s a good life,” David said. “Fifty years is quite the accomplishment I suppose, but it’s been the best adventure.”

“We don’t know where this life is going to take us,” Linda said, “but we’re going to enjoy every minute of this adventure … together. (Pausing briefly) Is that too mushy?”

“Maybe,” David said with a chuckle. “But it’s true.”